Shifting Foundations: Money, Money, Money

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This week we are going to talk about MONEY. If you are immediately cringing just hearing this topic, we’ve got some work to do.

I say this because that used to be me. I used to have an aversion to talking about money, especially when it related to my own personal finances. I did not grow up in a “wealthy” household but a working class, qualified for free lunches at school type family. Nevertheless my childhood was so rich, I didn’t realize that we were technically “poor” until my late teenage years when I moved out and was paying my own bills. I wasn’t taught money management skills like how to build and accumulate wealth or save for retirement. I spent a majority of my life working multiple jobs; sometimes because I loved the diversity; other times it was to make ends meet. For many of these years I had a strenuous relationship with money. I never seemed to have enough and that was stressful. It also made me resent money and wealthy people. I was mad at the inequity in the world and jealous of those who were born into wealth.

Fast forward to today and, as a woman and a life/business coach, money is one of my most favorite topics for myself and for my clients. I have completely changed my relationship to and with money & I love to help my clients do the same.

If you have been in or are in a similar boat of resenting money or being uncomfortable to talk about it, this week I encourage you to try a) examine your relationship with money b) notice how you feel about money c) stay open & curious i.e. ignore everything you have ever heard or have been told before.

You have probably heard the following phrases:

• Money makes the world go around.

• Money is the root of all evil.

• Money = power

Some of these statements may resonate with you and some you may believe to be true. My challenge for you is to consider the following: Each one of the statements above is simply a sentence of someone’s belief or opinion. They are not facts. They are just sentences. Buying into them or believing them is a choice that you can make.

Let’s take a look at your current relationship with money. On a scale of 1 to 10, where does your relationship with money fall?

Then answer: why did you give yourself this rating?

If you are not at a 10, what would it take to get you there?

Take a look at your answers. How many of the reasons you listed are opinions/beliefs of your own and how many of them come from someone else? How many of the reasons tie back to a feeling or an emotion? What within your answers is your control or outside of if? How does having or not having the amount of money you would like to, impact your life?

Then answer: when you think about the amount of money you currently have, what is the dominant feeling that comes over you?

If thinking of this makes your body feel restricted or contracted, notice that. Are you angry or upset? Do you avoid thinking about this or examining your future? Do you feel good about your financial situation? Does approaching this topic make you excited? Try to notice your initial reaction without judgement towards yourself.

Our best and most important work comes in when you can notice how you feel energetically towards money.

Go back to your dominant feeling. How does living in that state impact the energy you put out towards money?

What impact could a change in perspective or small shift have on your finances?

Mom, I am a rich man.

-Cher

I remember vividly the moment I had a major shift around my personal relationship to money. At the time I believed that rich people were greedy & slightly evil (as in they probably made their money through unethical means) and I didn’t want to become one of these rich & evil people. By holding onto this belief, I was inadvertently resisting the possibility of being rich. Changing this belief took one simple line of questioning from a mentor of mine:

What would happen if you and your closest, bestest friends had ridiculous amounts of money (the jet set, private plane type of wealth)? What do you think you guys would do with your money? What impact could this have on the world?

I immediately thought of all the amazing things my friends and I would do: buy up large tracts of jungles and put it into preservation, save all the dogs, send the local animal shelter $20,000, support our friends who need it, help out parents, start a scholarship fund, mentor young girls, surprise the single mom with a holiday shopping spree….the list goes on. This lit me up with inspiration. Why would we not want to be wealthy when our collective wealth would have these sorts of impacts? Of course we should be. Getting ridiculously rich asap would be a gift to ourselves and a gift to the world.

Think of the things you would do if you had jet set wealth?

What sort of energy or feeling does that bring you? Align yourself to that. If you haven’t done this before - get excited about money. Get excited about each paycheck or dollar that comes your way. Even if you buy something and return it, give thanks for the money returning to your bank account. Give thanks each time you pay a bill or credit card.

Practice generosity and receiving. Part of the flow of energy is being able to give and receive in abundance. Give what you can and from a place of contentment or peace (not from guilt or fear). Give in small ways or big ways. Make a list of the ways you can be generous to your family, your community, your home - noting that not all of these have to be monetary. They can also be energetic exchanges.

Then your work becomes learning to believe in possibility. Believe ridiculous wealth is possible for you. Believe you can pay off your debts and buy your dream home. Believe that you book that trip to Peru all in cash for you and your best friend.Believe you can work 4 days a week and make 6 figures. Believe you can have mounds of money in your bank account. Even when this line of thinking feels a little bit delulu, lean into that. Sometimes a little delulu is a good thing…. and you deserve very good things.

If you want help cultivating a better relationship to money, hit reply and tell me what will we be celebrating in 6 months time.

Xo, Naomi